Why Arguing Can Make Marriage Stronger
How many of you have brothers or sisters? Parents? Colleagues? Anyone you are or were with for long periods of time.
Have you ever had an argument with any one of them?
I bet that answer is yes.
Ok now, do you have arguments with your spouse?
I bet that is another yes.
You see, if you are with someone for a long period of time, there is going to come a time when you don’t see eye to eye. Even if you have a lot in common, there will always be SOMETHING you disagree with, even if it is just a pair of Misplaced shoes.
The difference between arguing with any of those other people and arguing with your spouse is, well, you have to live with them…forever.
Fighting means you care enough about something, or someone that you want to get things straight with them. You want them to see things from your point of view.
When you stop fighting, that is when you worry.
How many times have you disagreed with someone but instead of arguing with them, or voicing your opinion, you just walk away. Or you think to yourself “you know what, this just isn’t worth it.”?
It was most likely a colleague or friend.
Now, your spouse, you would (90% of the time) fire back something at them. Why? Because you care. You want to get that out. Because you want them to be on your page.
I am not saying that there aren’t times that you wouldn’t walk away from an argument with them, because there are. Like when you are too angry and could really say something you don’t mean.
But, more times than not, you are going to pick that fight. You are going to make sure they know how you feel.
This is healthy, I mean, as long as that isn’t all you do with them. I am sure there are just some people who can’t get along. I get that, I really do.
Marriage is worth fighting for.
The fights should be short lived.
Get your opinion out there.
Then, make up.
Move on, and don’t bring it up again.
You hear me girls?
DON’T BRING IT UP AGAIN
No one wants to relive an argument.
Makeup sex is the best sex
I also hear people say:
“Well, we don’t fight around the kids”
That’s a load of bullshit. Why? So your kids will have unrealistic expectations of marriage? Sounds great! (Insert hard eye roll)
We are human. We have opinions and beliefs and flaws, and we are going to fall from Grace from time to time, your kids need to see that.
You, as a partner, should not expect perfection from your spouse. You are not perfect yourself.
Look, marriage isn’t all rainbows and butterflies all of them time.
Your husband is going to ask you questions while he is taking a shit.
You are going to have to tell him all about your periods, otherwise he won’t know when to back the cluck off of you.
This will be the closest, most intimate relationship of your life.
This is sacred. You don’t want to have to redo all of this with another person.
That’s why, I would fight with, and for my husband until the day that I die.
There is no one else I would rather fight with.